Merry Christmas!

Have a safe and happy holiday with all the special people in your life!

Muahhhh
xoxox


Cindy

update

hey all,
i have been getting some emails, people wanting me to update my blog! I have neglected my blog, and my website has been neglected too. There WILL be updates :)

So its 2:18am, i am officially a NIGHT HAWK! haha. Shift really has done me in for having any type of regular or consistent or balanced routine. Hopefully i will not do that forever.

There was something awful that happened 10 days ago. Sophie died. Sophie was my parents dog. And if you have followed my blog for a few years you will remember back to less than 3 years ago when i got Sophie for my parents from the pet store. I use to visit the pet store alot and she was this cute lil pekingnese dog that was still for sale at 6 months old. it was awful, i had to rescue her from that cage. You will also remember sophie was almost as close to me as my dogs, i loved her very much. She just had her 3rd birthday last month :(. It all happened so fast. Sophie was acting kina weird, and she wasn't eating much etc, nothin major, just not acting herself. Mom and Dad took her to the Vet 5 times here in the span of about a week. Blood tests, xrays everything turned out fine. On her fifth visit, the vet told my parents they would need to take her to a specialty vet college to try and find out what was wrong. So dad drove the 3 hr drive over last Friday, dropped her off, kissed her and had planned to pick her up sun or monday. Then friday after dad got home, he got a call that none of us wanted to hear. When being put under anesthesia so that could get the spinal fluid to find out more info, Sophie had a reaction to the anesthesia. She had a heart attack, and was no longer breathing on her own. They bagged her for 2 hrs, then she began breathing on her own. That night we drove over to see her and spend time with her in case it was her last moments. When we got there, we were devastated. She looked awful. I was so sad, and the image of her lying there is forever etched in my head. We spent some time with her friday and her eyes were open, i think she knew we were there. We stayed in a hotel fri night and went back over to see her saturday. She was having trouble breathing. so they had to insert a breathing tube for her, and when they did, sophie had had 3 gramal seizures. She was about to have another seizure, when we realized we had to youthanize her immeditaly. We were there with her when she died, it was one of the saddest things i ever felt. But i was happy she wasnt alone when she died. The odtopsy determined Sophie has meningitis. A disease of the brain.
rest in peace sophie, xoxox

I have been training more. Feeling better.... And i am not ruling out a possible competition in 2010. Maybe not, but there is a part of me that has left so many things unsaid, untold, and unsure i can MOVE on beyond it yet. I am back and fourth, with so many things, for so many reasons i cant even begin to explain. If there is one thing you have gotten from my blog, it is my indecisiveness and my honesty. So, again there is it :)


I am very much looking forward to the holidays. We had our first snowfall today. I have my new tree up and i am loving decorating the new house. I have almost all my shopping done! I love Christmas and i love giving presents and baking. Its a wonderful time of year to be with family and to spend time with those u love.

Thanks for listening!

All my love,

Cindy

~ You only have one life to live, live it with passion! ~

days past....

Hey all
Sorry that i havent been updating this thing. I am keeping my site going, so me not updating this is not an indication of my site closing up.

Things have been changing up for me latley. I am enjoying the gym and seeing things a bit differnt. I really had given up for a while and really was not happy. TOTALLY just let myself go cauz i thought thats what i needed was just to just let go- but it wasn't. It is hard work being in shape but it is worth it- i do not wana fall to this place i am in again. Its not fun. I dont wana be uncomfortable and just plain FAT anymore. I am done with doing that!! I have to be done if i wana live a happy, fulfilling life. Sometimes you think food is fulfilling and a part of life- but its not, food should not determine feelings. Slowly i learn each day. Things are improving though, and i am getting to a healthier self. i want my disciplined self back.....

this was accomplishment and happinesss...




Bye for now,

all my love,

Cin

Hi...

here is a pic from last night! fun times :)
congrats to all those who qulaified for the O at the Atl city this weekend! Top 3 were perfectttt :) I'm excited for them! 2 weeks. I will be in JAMAICA during the olympia. NEVER been to Jamaica, sooo excited! kinda wish i was going to see the Olympia. I will follow along on my mac though,


have a good week,
xoxo

Cindy

tweetin

U can follow me on twitter, ill try to update as an easier way to keep in touch for those interested :)

i am canchick on twitter

xo,

Cin

as summer ends....

its hard to belive summer is now ending! I remember when i was younger all the anxiety i would have right now awaiting school days to begin. I dont miss that! The day light is getting shorter and shorter too, if only it could be nice all year.

Things have been good with me.....strange though. You know its weird having a differnt mind set. For the last MANY years of my life i have either been preparing for a show, or "offseason" or just inbetween. But i was always had that bodybuilding mind set, always had my training, my meals, my schedule on my mind. My life was lived around what i was doing in regards to bodybuilding. So its nice to wake up and just do what i want, go to the gym when i want and just have a differnt look on things for a change. :)

I do hope and plan to come back to bodybuilding in the future, but for now im enjoying my life just as is!


All my love to everyone who has always believed in me! its YOU that will keep me coming back for more.... i hope to keep my fans and come back even better down the road!


xoxoxox,

~ Cindy ~

few pics~